today was an ordinary day

and it was extrordinarily happy...


-Boss was out today.
-Had a very good time at the gym.
-Got a pretty, new, light counter-sniper rifle (still nameless).
-Traded my GOOD BUDDY for a custom made folding dagger. PRICELESS (ie. a knife he would not make for money alone.)
-and... the ebay seller who sold me my NEO GEO offered to buy me a new cable from his own pocket. There are STILL honourable people in the world. I think I judged him right...

-KAMPAI! Cheers! : D
"this is where you saw my naked soul - this is where I long to be..." [Janiero]

even if something is BLACK, I can make it WHITE

I just finished watching the last episoide of Gungrave.
OH!! DA TEEEARS!

-My God.. I haven't cried this much (as in total bawling, roaring,cover your mouth contortion crying - mental breakdown).. my nerves are still in shivers and it's still cold (and no, my Neo Geo is not making me warm).. My sinuses are totally clear and so are my tear ducts.

-The final scene was left blank.. true to the "fill in the blank" motiv.. things are better left unsaid in a perfect story I guess.... There are only two ways that could have ended really.. 1) Harry and brandon's bodies were gone, except their clothes or guns. 2) Harry and Brandon's bodies are teenagers again and arms across each other (ok maybe that's my Shonen ai side talking ^_^).. plus the BLACK and WHITE speech, the exchange guns shot and the black coat and white duo.. . the director knows a bit of John Woo after all ^_^ (blows nose and wipes eyes).

I think I need to take a walk.. ONE AGAIN I recind my initial statement. Gungrave anime is better than the game, as far as story...

I want to know if the HK DVD cut anything or if the anime really ended at "Okaerinasai" if so. Then it is perfect. PERFECT.

ohayou too early!

Is LOVE & HATE the only emotion available between a man & a woman?

[ofcourse]

p@_@q I woke up too early at 4 am EEK! eek! and no Neo Geo to keep me warm.. NOOOO! Panikuu panikuu system!!

Instead I watched this - this trailer (MGS3) is just so very cool on many levels - but - that's just me... and the monkeys, and a whole clan of Johnnies. (thanks for the link Yuu)

MGS3

this is, 「天罰」 da

if you still bear a grudge, and they've moved on with their lives, then son, "it is very simple"; you've LOST the fight...


the fucked up thought of the day... since 1978
[to be archived in the future...]

-to feel like you want to kill someone, at the expense of your own integrity and life, that is the [true] meaning of the [fight]. This I will always believe, everything else is NONESENSE. The very least you could do, is treat me with the same respect.

I don't want to be sad anymore

Boys, we're going home, NOW!



Mr. Mailman.. bring me a dream.. a dream so bright - for the whole world to see... IT'S HERE!!!!! : D I guess I won't be working out tonight : \ well.. maybe my wrists and fingers ; )

UPDATE ON THE SAGA!!
-I couldn't stand it and drove back HOME as fast as I could and took a little extended lunch.. only to find out.. THAT A CABLE IS MISSING!!! ARGH!! I can buy one yeah but it means MORE WAITING >_<. Not like I can buy one at the mall. GYADDAMN!

time to go to sleep, boy...

do you... really think your choice is right? Oyasumi.

...you will never forget those who you LOVE so much and those youve grown to HATE.

this is my final gift to you. "My name is Z... remember me, and let [HIM] know my name."

when a man picks up a gun

SORROW WILL silently FOLLOW HIM THE REST OF HIS DAYS

-I have forgotten (and overlooked) one side effect to this old hairstyle. Instead of my old spikey hairstyle that looks like a damn asian porn star, this hairstyle seems to make you want to talk to yourself more. It can really drive you crazy.

-I am tired of losing friends. I don't want to lose any more friends... but there is only one solution to this unfortunately.

-I got up with a hangover this morning (not as horrible as last week) (the G36 was ofcourse unloaded so I coudn't blow my brains out that way). Went to my friends house so I could ride in his new BMW Z3 coupe.. very excited.. but when I got there, his NEWLY BOUGHT car woudln't start. I had to stay conscious until 4 pm (I should have known better and gotten food - no breakfast or lunch for me.) and we watched RESIDENT EVIL 2.

-Resident Evil 2. Well I love beautiful Ukranian acresses in zombie movies : ) but this film was really a HIGH BUDGET CYNTHIA ROTHROCK movie. A man in a rubber suit against a hot girl with guns and some moves. Unlike the first movie which I loved, this one has Jovovich in a fishnet (bleah) and all her fighting moves were MASKED in ARTISTIC frame cutting and blurring. The first movie showed off more (moves) but they just cheated here I could hardly see anything. The moves were good but looked fake with the artistic motion blur. I don't think a pint of GUINESS could have helped this movie. This movie is just dumb and a show off. The first tho randomly scary had good bio virus theory, a bitchin soundtrack and also a plot and tactile story. This one was too chaotic. Hellif they copied the vieogame I would have liked it.

-THO I have to admit.. I developed a weakness for 2 SWAT type tactical mercenaries who have 1) a nice italian and yugoslavian/israeli(?) accent. 2) Names Nicoli & Yuri. 3) Not bad looking either : ).

-The whole movie just wanted me to jump of a flying object with a rope and some guns and.. well you get it..

- Being a fan of the game and bio virus theory.. well it wasn't in this one.. they explained too much and just had diposable poeple dying and Mila kicking butt for no good reason. Call me sexist but I will be frank that I really don't get off with a pretty girl shooting things or kicking butt (bubblegum crisis was never a 'classic' for me). (I have seen some women who could REALLY kick my ass in Muai Tai - but you know the psyche is not portrayed well in movies - sorry i can't respect a cute girl with a gun EVER - until she has that barrel pointed at my head with a calm face - yeah I am sexist or just disillusioned with hollywood). I liked the first Resident evil because of the irony of Alice (in wonderland) with a red dress.. the irony of fighting in one of those.. I think it is the same way in better Tomorrow 2 when Chow was a gunslinging chef. Did Jovovich look great in the red dress and leathr jacket.. DEFINITELY.. an out of place costume.. yeah.. (and ofcourse Michelle Rodriguez was there.. ok I take it back I respect her for a good tough girl portral.. in fact the BEST!! She is prolly the only gun toting woman actress I would respect...)

-Chinese people are really a screwed up bunch of folks. Being raised by one, and BEING one.. I know what they are force fed as kids. (kind a sad, the old 1st-2nd generation anyways.) Everyone is out to screw you in life, and if you let them then its YOUR FAULT, not theirs. its really dishearting when you're being lectured this at 8 years old. Them Chinese guys.. they are after your money, your time, your affection, your attention, and if not they're out to prove that they are better than you... or.. is that all people in general?

-I am really tired of losing friends I love.

I recind my initial ultimatum...

未来を見エルなのかい？デキレバ、教えてくれヨ。

-After watching GUNGRAVE episode DAUGHTER & LAST BULLET (the later I HAD to watch again and again with no subs)... I have found that the director (and added budget on the animation and chara design on those two eps) transcends the GREATNESS of the PS2 game...

i regret tomorrow; more than yesterday

MAN makes DOLLS in his image; if so - are we not dolls to god?
I'm taking the long way home... be responsible for EVERYTHING you GIVE and TAKE in this earth. If I weave stories, and make my characters SUFFER - will they suffer for my sake?


BUNJIiii!!!! ANIKIiiiii!!!

i dont want to die yet

time stops, now - people thrive on pain





UNDER.CONSTRUCTION.forever

it's ok, but it's not a test

don't worry, I've done this before, honey...



"No commento... de gozaimasu."

KOF-2k2

IT HAS ARRIVED!!! (oh my GOD! Vice & Mature are back.. it makes my insides twist and my heart beat faster.)
YESTERDAY & TODAY will soon be the SAME!

(tho its rather frustrating to find out that my USA Neo Geo carts I once sold has become rare collectors items >_<)

DO [IT],NOW.

comedy has its place in the world of pain...

only drawing tonight.. yuu's J.HOLIDAY in 2004?
will I be able to reverse the revolution of the earth? this is his mission!

-I was able to SCORE a NEO GEO CART SYSTEM! : D
one step towards a great plan!!!

"I request a fight with you."

to me, there are no other spoken words that are more passionate in this damn world...

"...he is inferior to a dog, why cannot I laugh?" -Lee/GG(anime)

In order to fully understand the complexities of this gray world; one must first take to heart, and accept, the carnal black and white prejudices that are established in life... only from this acceptance, can [I] hope to understand the rules that make those prejudiced truth, faulty.

This is a paradox of TRUTH - that in order t o find the real [it], one must prove [this] TRUTH as FALSE...
the expectations the world has for a MAN and a WOMAN; a GUN and a BLADE, divisible to that insignificant sexism, and to destroy this theory. This is the will of understanding - in my own twisted mind.

I must first accept what prejudice logic was presented to me, then prove it wrong and understanding what makes the theory wrong, then will the future be revealed to me...

~*^*~

DAMN that was a long stream of cnsciousness >_<.. that teaches me to forgo (for a while) my ditzy nature and try to "think" sometimes (like Ralf says in PURPLE, dont make me think, its bad for my body). But its true tho scientifically. In order to prove a fundamental truth/theorem in science one must prove it in 100 situations, but it only takes one falsification to make a theorem crumble.

--I just watched a few more episiodes of GUNGRAVE (ANIME). Particularly the LEE versus and the BEAR WALKEN versus.

--I am pretty much convinced that those are really good episodes, but that the director is probably not an obsessive GG Game story fan. Case (in my ) point, Bunji did NOT intervene in the Lee fight.. The whole Mika vs Lee talk was pretty much perfect and transcends the game story but lacked when bunji did not step in.. In my story, Lee would be screaming "BUUUNJIIIII KISAMAAA!!" and Bunji would reply "Fight him fairly." if he even said anything at all.

---BEAR WALKEN episode.. PERFECT & I admit the depth of BEAR in the ANIME was SO MUCH BETTER than the game story. With his relationship with his crew "Overkill" to his choice lines.. ^_^d awesome.. this is an episode I will watch again before I go on... I rewinded a lot withthe tearjerking scenes.

--I think the chara designs of the SUPERIORIZED enemies was more "practical" than the flashy Game design, but still the fight was too short.. DVD 3 is the best, but sorry, they spent TOO MUCH time on the 1st DVD when they could have done so much more to increase tension and impact in DVD3. (criticize criticize.. : p gomen... but then again this is an angsty MINDLESS SHOOTING ACTION, isn't it?)

--Ah so wonderful indeed. "This is just a story of a man, who's life never could turned out the way he wished it would have..." (-Y.) Well said buddy...

STAND LIKE A JOJO!!

I'M NOT WORTHY!!!!!

Indeed there are others in the world as twisted than me!! ;___;
I HAVE FOUND A NEW MISSION IN THIS PITYFUL LIFE!!!
TRAVERSE!! THE WORLD!! & STAND LIKE A JOJO!
CONTORTIONS! FLASH! IMPACT! ENGRISH FIRE!!!


JOJO POSING SCHOOL!

TSURAI

to be greeted by "OKAERINASAI" must have been the greatest feeling of my life..
if only to save one person in the world, maybe heroes can find accomplishment in their lives...



(here is a work in progress scrimshaw I am doing for one of my 1911 pistols : D since I was scared to use real ivory I practiced on some (fake) Ivory micarta - ghetto style with a blade and basically an ice pick...
[PRECISION FIGHTERS]
...watching GUNGRAVE now. AWESOME! ..but NOTHING compares to the opening scene of the PS2 game : ) I am such a simpleton really, I love that opening scene. [PERFECTION].
my only qualm was that the GUNGRAVE anime was not directed/screenplayed better (it had to be done by someone who loved it passionately). Hell, I would have donated my time and a pint of blood to get a chance to be a part of that team. Megalomaniac as I am I would be HAIL KING S of the GG project, with squeaky hammer in hand.

HELLO MISTER TERAO!!

Do you know how to dance the old way?




I don't know why but I was compelled to stay a few extra minutes at work today.. Long day... Friday night.. maybe the future will make itself clear to me tonight... (Here is a sketch of Yuu's new infatuation ^_-, GTT in STAND-ready form - I got tired and will have to add in [GALACTIC RIDER] a bit later)

...and no he's NOT lefthanded.. URGH!! realized what I had done AFTER I scanned >_<

-Will watch GHOST IN THE SHELL 2 tomorrow with a few college buddies. (We will bring beer so the movie doesn't eat our brains like the first one.

WE CANNOT TURN BACK TIME

instead, I will drop [heaven] from the sky
...and my revenge will be that I will make
[today] & [yesterday], one & the same.



-I have a bad bad craving to get a NEO GEO cartridge system (maybe its because I have returned to my old hairstyle ^_^ I feel like a biochemical change has occured in my brain.) I was thinking MAN that's expensive for a GAME SYSTEM. Then I remembered how much I spend on GUNS & KNIVES (Hell just ONE GUN or KNIFE - EEEK!)! I WANT IT BACK DAMN IT! FEAR MY MERCILESS BIDDING SK33LZ!

HERO KENZAN!!

TSUI NI KITTA KA, Hero-meh?!
So, you've finally arrived... Hero?



-MAZDA COSMO SPORT
-Sideburns
-BAD.BAD.BAKUsozoku tenchcoat
-1969

Waking up at 0330 AM

- Last night, I crashed too quickly from a very ecstatic and giddy mood. As a result I woke up at 3:30 AM this morning o_o so what was I to do but go to the gym. Its a different world in the gym at 5:30 AM - a different subculture I must say from the evening gym people or the midday gym people. I can see myself just DROP DEAD by noon.

- Last night I had a dream. About my Dad, but more importantly, about my old faithful Neo Geo Cartridge system ;_;

- HOORAY!! I have a public access JUNKS DIRECTORY : ) http://geocities.com/sniperboy001/junks/

- Last night as well, a good buddy of mine FOUND (and bought) his dream car. This guy is the most fickle bastard out there and he's finaly done it. To find "it" whatever "it" may be in life.. how envious I am.

- This morning I went back to my old hairstyle...

SECOND GAG

OK I am hungry - but I felt kinda giddy this morning. (Hey its better than being angsty ^__^) and thought to do another installment of B&S roadshow... I have plans for the "HOORAY PUNCH" storyline but I wanted to get this homage out of my system.. Enjoy.

Tadaima...

[okaerinasai...]

...ah.. what a beautiful exchange of words Japanese culture has.
Just uploaded CHAPTER 13 of PURPLE. (if you don't see OKAERINASAI, then reload (uploaded too early and having troubles with cache on pba.com), you don't have the true ending ^__^). OK I think this is the Chapter 13 I wanted for the longest time...
I remixed the chapter >_<, I can't help it...

omattasettana...

remember history

forget the future...

I still have a SHIGGY art I have to finish (I have liked his chara design and want to make him [bad guy], resisting very hard not to make him Bonifacio/Tensai : p I need a cheery campy design that is the opposite of Z's gloomy gothic look... without being as too optimistic as GIORGIO Holiday... very hard...

but yes.. no pics tonight : ( but I did dig thru my old digital sketchbook...



Now that I think it doesn't matter much. I thought it was charming that Eisu had planned JOHN MATTHEWS to be the reincarnation of Johnny Holiday + Jack Vacation : p to be Kent Furio's... OK I got that off my chest...

and here...



Good old Giogrio H. I did this as a poster for a buddy's anime/knife shop in Europe (what a combo considering that regular anime kids shouldn't be mall ninja-ing). : ] In some sick way I was pretty happy with it.. I forget if I posted it before...

As evil as I want to be, I really am not all that nihilistic... I sincerely believe that justice only resorts to VIOLENCE in order to accomplish a pure goal.. that is PEACE on Earth and that must become the true purpose of violence - to combat the immoral evil, anything else is [perversion] of this tool... Who knows what will happen once peace is achieved... but I hope, from the bottom of my heart, that there are more people in the world like Giorgio Holiday.

Because EVIL preys on the dreams of the [single heart], and as such [it] must be defeated.

All Holidays are in fact... anti-gun.

Driven by instinct

I really couldn't help it. As I was driving home from breakfast yesterday I saw a silver Mazda RX7 (tho it was not as pimpe dout as this one) (I am not a car fan, but man these are such beautiful cars ^___^) and being the obsessive stalker that I am I FOLLOWED IT!! (Cause I thought it lived closeby). It didn't take me back to its lair, but instead showed me a COOL new way to get out of the island I live in... This could come in handy when the zombies come and everyone is blocking traffic cause they only know of one bridge out of our impenetrable fortress!!

OK that's enough. I am not a bad guy really.. just... obsessive.. at times.

(Stares at beloved Raymond Briggs SNOWMEN collection).

Yesterday I also went to a friends' friends' house.. the wife of the friends' friend owned a YELLOW RX8 complete with a PIKACHUU sticker on the hood.. >__<>SLAYERS EXCELLENT. As expected when I got home my brain was mush and had no drive to do PURPLE!!! URGH!

just another ordinary day

in the lives of extraordinary people

Blogs are wonderful things.. it is a time tested device (a journal) that helps you keep a record of your past mistakes that you can laugh or cry about in the future, much like why people take pictures to "preserve and protect that memory..." -[GET BACKERS] at the same time it appeals to our often denied yet fiery NARCISSISTIC nature to have the world "watch as we suffer". It's kind of weird, I realize today that, like many things in this earth, everything is double sided.

-In order to be happy, many feel (tho they might not consciously think it); that others must suffer before them.
-at the same time some masochists feel that they must SUFFER (like good old JC, yes I am kind of religious in my own way) in order to show the world their sorrow, and feel self worth.
-WATCH ME! This is the SICK beauty of the internet.

I just got back from the JTOWN ANIME FAIRE (SF) It was a small con and very unorganized.. I spent most of my time trying to find the video rooms and also finding the damn ARTISTS ALLEY : ( poo I didn't find it in the end. For the most part I like small shows... very quaint, but I felt that there was not much to do.. many guys will say that it's only their 2nd year and they need to go thru growing pains... but (if I may sound like an old grump), back 6 years ago I've been to "year 2" anime cons that kicked more ass.

Having the con in JAPAN TOWN in SAN FRAN-fuckin-CISCO in a twlight zone of Japanese culture and a Japanese mall is a stroke of GENIUS. Many cons in the past I went to tried their best (and did a good job) to WARP reality and convert the hotel into its own private dimension that is Japan+Anime (this being in the east coast mostly was a cool thing since Asian culture was sparse).

For some reason some woman started shouting at me as I walked by with a strawberry + Nutella crepe.. scary...
>_<

--->this is what I did (how nostalgic/under consto...)

-->Get Backers!!
->this is a series that was recommended to me by my brother. I was quite surprised since it was not about tactics or military history. From looking at the pics, it seems like a welcome -old school- SHONEN ANIME, in the golden league of Yu Yu Hakusho (an old favourite of mine when I went to Japan when I was 13). I saw it today (it was DUBBED!! ARGH! but I sat thru it and just blocked out the english and imagined what the Japanese lines would be.) I thought it was campy yet had substance.

A good "buddy" anime that I enjoy immensely... It had cute female chara designs (rolls eyes.. okay I need to learn that skill) that looked near identical to KYOSUKE FUJISHIMA (Ah! My Goddess! & You're Under Arrest), PLUS had a SHARP bishonen design for the guys. I am sure the YAOI fanartists (don't look at me please ^__^) will have a frickin field day with this series : ). Another series that is true and tested to the fine formula of appealing to both boys and girls. So sharp so evil.. BEAUTIFUL

I felt as if the delivery of the series was for the younger crowd. ie. it explained TOO much and made it kinda cheesy instead of TRUSTING the viewer to read between the lines. (Oh she did this cause he did that.. boo hoo... so this is what really happened cause I will explain it to you.) Kyosuke Fujishima (God bless his too cutesey soul) once said "a manga is meant to deliver a message to the audience, but if the audience cannot decipher the message then your efforts are wated."

I [rant] only because this series has great eye candy and substance that doesn't need overt explaining. That is why I like the GUNGRAVE game story vs the GUNGRAVE anime story. Still I WILL get the series. it appeals to my golden hair x spiky head fuuryou formula (as opposed to Yuu's Regent ^^;; Yuu has to teach me the greatness of [R]). One thing that really got to me was the cool JYAGAN NIGHTMARE move that one of the lead characters had. It is a plot power/engine I like to use very much in my works eversince I saw PHOENIX IKKI in SAINT SEIYA back in the early 90s. I guess nothing is new under the sun in shonendom... I have been asked "Is that one character you have, Abigail with the tattoo on the face copied from Naruto?" {no, Abigail was made up and BASARA was from ALIEN3} I can see it now... "Daaayuumn, dude, you so ripped off JYAGAN from get Backers with your SAI + DIABLO KISS." : p

...but if you know me.. yes like a fuckin' wuss, I cried when i watched GET BACKERS!!

-->420J stainless steel taiwan ninja swords
->WHAT GENIUS. The knife and sword community I partake in would NEVER even look at one of those "ninja" swords, and BLADE 3 prong folding star blades. I once thought that it would be a GREAT business to sell these decorative swords, sharpened (cause most decorative swords I was aware of back then were not sharpened.) to college kids.. but I was SO WRONG. CONS!! MALL NINJAS galore bought these repulsive katanas and sci fi weaponry by the truckload. Waving them around like the awesome cho bery sugoi ninjas they were.. sorry for being arrogant - maybe I am just jealous for not realizing the $$$ myself (me being slit eyed and all).. I was constantly at CONDITION RED the whole frickin con. Cheap, albeit, "LIVE" blades waving around ready to poke an eye out. I once thought the "peace tie" (when you tie a white string on your "live" blade to keep it in its sheath) was stupid.. but I now realize that you really can't expect everyone in the world to be as reasonable or responsible as yourself.

-->Naruto
->I hear its the new "Dragon Ball Z" of y2k. I can see why. its pretty good and entertaining (yes I cried.. grumble) The first 2 eps I saw were very good and enjoyable.. It was worth dragging my hung over body to SF to the con : D. When I went to the dealer's room and saw snippets of future episodes, it looks very solid!!! I need to get this series too... For the past few yeas I have been complaining that the golden age of SHONEN (late 90s) was over due to the Japanese recession, but I guess it was just me not paying attention!

-->FUCKING $40.00 Naruto metal plate headbands
->Had GOD whispered in my ear I would have gotten a TRUCKLOAD of these metal headbands that is integral of the Naruto series.. I wanted to get one as a sovenier but MAN $40.00?!?! I could have made a killing if I ONLY sold that. Never had I seen a high priced cosplay item sell SO WELL. NEVER in my xx years of conning!!! I LOVE IT!!! THE YOUTH DRIVE THE ECONOMY!!! GOD BLESS YOU IN HEAVEN!

-->SWEET COSTUMES.
->I saw a Dante (from devil may cry) the guy got a lot of attention ; ) not the sexiest real life bishonen out there but a great costume.. there was a cool TRIGUN costume thre too.. complete with burned up bulletholes.

-->Keroro Gunsou
->slapstick... sickingly addictive : D not as nonsensical as FLCL but I couldn't help but just LAUGH -OUT-LOUD!! Flying subtitle - de arimasu... I was complaining that the politics of cons the past few years sucked with big name production companies like fucking VIZ VIDEO cracking down on fan subs and "illegal" showings. Well screw them.. this is what a con is all about... stuff you can't buy off the shelves. I like small cons who don't give a damn or are just too dumb to be noticed ; ). I haven't laughed this hard since DRAGON HALF.

-->TRIGUN 9 + PRIEST 12
->Got new manga : ) hooray manga! I want to make my "mad sk33lz laoratoty" I am building (to draw and do gunsmithing) like the otaku rooms you see in anime. Hooray korean antichrist end of days Manhwa. (I still have to find "Tonight I will..." which is a korean Manhwa I have been trying to get for yers now but all my korean "friends" were slackers... Even if I dont read your language I'll get it damn it.

-->SHADOW SKILL
->I spent ages round and round one by one looking for the SHADOW SKILL manga in KINOKUNIYA until I wanted to puke. no luck : (

-->Gungrave DVD3
->I HAVE IT!! PRAISE THE LORD!!! Now I can feeeeel the paaaain!!! I also got my GLOCK 36 and a nice ballcap from my buddy today : D. Its good to have friends. I don't like small guns as a rule but I am happy to get this CUTE little piece.. very accurate too!!! It performs superbly as a compact piece and doesn't jump around as I had feared. I think I could still take an eye out with it : D

I saw the latest cover of TIME magazine - it read "How to say NO to your kids; in a time of excess.." or some bullshit like that. The cover was a pic of an angry mother, face to face with a snub nosed frowning kid with earphones. I feel OLD again here but, let me rant (grr I did it again.. grrr). This is BULLSHIT!

Had I made that face to my mother when I was a kid it would be BEATINGS, then locked up in the closet. NO QUESTION!!! I know frickin liberal journalism is about shock factor, and no I didn't read the article, but I think I know what would be in that magazine (and I think so do you)... The world is just going to -hell-, JOHNNY style.

OK maybe I am irked cause my mother always says "you have to TEACH your brother." I love the kid, but man when I teach him PSHONEN style (which is the only way I know) I get scolded then the silent treatment.. screw that.. the world indeed has changed...

What a rush today was great but I wished that I had someone to spend it with.. unfortuantely I don't think I have any buddies near me that has as much interest in anime as I do to just walk up and down Jtown and feel like I am in another world.

I wished I had a costume. Some of the gus were pretty cool.. Like that DANTE guy (Devil May Cry). Tho I think some con goers have a weird smell... and boldly speak bad Japanese and Chinese.. that is why I don't like speaking Japanese or Chinese to native speakers *>_<* low self esteem there... Poor white guy next to me must have felt so proud (and pretty good too) he spoke both Japanese AND Chinese, he was probably so elated that he never realized the Chinese saleswoman he was talking to would roll her eyes frown and answer in English. Some people can be so cruel.

the only thing [CONSTANT] in this world, is [change]

people change, yet some things never change...

It's weird meeting up with a college buddy you haven't seen in 4 years or so. Really puts things in perspective... I took Jinus out to ANGEL FISH, the local AWESOME sushi joint (best in CA as far as I am concerned, hell in North America...) and its funny the stories that you hear again. Pain and happiness seems like it's so far behind you.

I guess we are all human.. you see the changes but in the end nothing's changed.
"Everything has chains, absolutely nothing's changed."

Everytime I meet someone from my past, friend or enemy, I feel a part of myself returning. Sometimes I welcome it - oftentimes I don't... but its an experience none the less... Pittsburgh was really a great [place]. It was where PShonen was born, and I will go back one day - if only to feel the cold pain of snow.

...anywyas I gotta turn in for the night.. long day and long night. I have to wake up early tomorrow cause I have to get my new kawaiiiiiiii-ko-chan GLOCK 36. ; D


"..tomo yo".. you've done me a GREAT SERVICE, because if not for you, I would not have been saved, and I would not love the warm hatred so. Today or yesterday, I hope I never meet you again...
cause in the end, we all wanted to be saved.

MOU II!!

damn my first whiney post >__<
I have had enough of this crap. It's time for the heroes to GO HOME!
Maybe in another life I was a BULEMIC cause I feel like going home, run around the block 20 time and just PUKE all this DISGUSTING BLACK ANGST AND FRUSTRATION from my body.

[they] enjoy your suffering...

each and every day

"I have come to believe this as true - that, the real price of ones happiness, whether one is aware of it or not, is to make others suffer... despite all the joy strangers have generously given me - I hope to be proven wrong one day."
"but ...I love to say "NO" to those guys who think of themselves EXTREMELY good..." JOJO4



(this is a SCALED DOWN IMAGE -
you can view the full version here ==> ICHIGEKI!!!

Going back to my roots, I had a SUDDEN, PAINFUL urge to draw Holiday, in his most purest [EVIL] form. (No T&Z or PURPLE tonight, and I still have to colour my buddy's T-shirt design >__< urgh!!! I keep procrastinating cause everyone wants me to draw cute women XP, hope Jim doesn't see this.. Dude.. seriously its a labour of love and devotion.)... humbly speaking, I think this is the way I wanted to draw Holiday from the beginning (hair, etc...)(but didn't have the ability to, 6 years ago, but I still have a long way to go cause I see all my errors).. I think his look is not snobbish and ARROGANT enough.. but hey it was what needed to be drawn at the time... Its good to see Holiday again : D

"Growing up" in Pittsburgh, PA - I have a weakness for a fine Philly Cheesesteak (more than any other weakness, like say a hot sexy model in leather :D) (and being stared at, as a strange, blacked haired, slit eyed person) That coupled with a TRUE North Carolinan glass of SWEET TEA, I am set. I think I need to go back one day, preferably in the winter so I can wear my wool Chow Yun Fat coat. Walk with a fixed blade in my belt and just -be-. (CA sucks!)(I think I would cry if I went back...)

Between just doing OT (overtime) at work.. ~MUKATSUKU~, I have been revisitting RUSSIAN MARTIAL ARTS (Systema) and also researching true and tested SHONEN phrases (in Russian) like "DIE", "ONE SHOT (ichigeki?)", "GENIUS", "GOOD MORNING" & "THANK YOU"... sadly, not being in school anymore, I don't have any Russian friends to ask. (all for the sake of TZ chapter 1) - I always thought that the classic names in Russian were Misha, Boris & Yuri.. I am trying not to use those names...
>__<;;

Speaking of which I am REALLY looking forward to getting fansubs (eventho I am so out of the loop) for AREA 88 - remake - hopefully my brother doesn't slack off and finds me one. I LOVE 80s anime, and I think that 88 is one of the perfect examples of symbiotism between SHOUJO and SHONEN. I just want to relive the time I was in my dormroom and screamed "BORIS!!" during [that] pivotal scene...

EVERYONE MUST PAY! because Boris had to suffer... This is the feeling I wanted to invoke.

So it comes to the end of the "ravent"... (a rant and rave at the same time... plus I don't like to use the word RANT cause its WEAK.) before I turn in, I have been thinking of my favourite phrase all day "Raison D'etre", which means "reason for being..." tho I am not so into French as a language, I think it is a romantic phrase (go figure) but too snobbish and not as badass enough as say Cantonese, this phrase was taught to me by my good Japanese friend, Shigeo-san.

We are all driven by something... by pain, hunger, even revenge or blind devotion, for those we think are important in our lives, even when that love is unrequited. Each reason is as viable as another, and is a welcome alternative to living life aimlessly. ...being the way I am for the past 2 years, there are two things I don't do often.. that is 1) read and 2) think.. I guess I fancy myelf as a bubble-headed ditzy asian. Don't get me wrong, most asians I know are pretty ANGSTY, ROUGH and wear only black or white - full of pain, from historical perspective. (Asians as immigrans had to work really really hard, but I think were not OPPPRESSED as brutally as other ethnic minourities - maybe cause asians like me are so charming, cute and cuddly ^__^ ohoho)

...so yes in all seriousness now before I lose my train of thought. I wonder if I have changed since the past. 5 odd or so years ago I made a prediction that in the future, I would, from time to time, want to ask my younger self a question. What I would give to go back in time and walk into KIVA HAN coffee house and sit down in front of that loser who looked like Shinji M drinking that large coffee and eating that arrogant packaged pasta, would S. be shocked that the future self visitted? ...but I would smile and say...
"S., if I were to make peace with the monsters in my past, would I merely cease to exist?"

raison d'etre

rai·son d'ê·tre (French)
1. reason for being.
2. the purpose that justifies a thing's existence.

men love to watch you suffer,
...the hate makes me warm.
world won't end, till you say so.
-and this is the ballad of BAD BAD JOHNNY.

ARAKI-senei to hanasu tame ni,

nihongo wo 3 nen kan benkyou shita'n desu yo!
--> surely -if- Hirohiko Araki-sensei were to come to the USA (eventho we ALL know he loves the USA and F1 racing, but he loves Europe equally so that's not much luck), it would be because...

a) he has become "mainstream".
b) there are a lot of signature hunters I have to kill.
(as i hear eversince 6 years ago when I was a 'anime-connie' they have imposed "limits" to signatures.) FUCK THAT. It's bang bang 1911 time!!!

...so, if you're reading this and know when Araki comes to the USA.. let me know and I will part frickin MOUNTAINS to say "arigatou" to him.

NEVER DRAW YOUR WEAPON

until you are prepared to KILL your opponent.


I touched up the past art.. I liked showing more detail.
(NOTE: the pic on the blog is shrunk down to fit. Thus the grainy look.)
Here's the 100% FEEL version
SHIGGY is currently grawing on my head, wanting some character development >__<

Everyone has something to say...

and you just have to listen

it was a lazy Sunday afternoon and everything was OK in the world. Spent time hanging with a few different frinds today and te time passed very quickly. I scored (scorzoroid!!) some AWESOME knives thanks to real good buddies looking out for me.. ;__; having good friends is great (thanks Wylie you OWNZOR me). that really blew me away this morning.. praise the lord for knife treasures found in back alley gun shows : D

I was pretty much driving and hanging out all day and didn't even notice the time pass between visitting knife and anime bds.. tho fun the day left me drained and wanting some me time to organize my thoughts and just relax. I am pretty spazmo like that when I get a lot of info at once. (and I need to assimilate it and digest it)

I enjoyed the pic I did yesterday of Z and TERRIBLE MASTER (Anubis) and might touch that up a bit.. I really wanted to do a page fo Tensai just for practice.. that and my new Initial D Stage 4 DVD 2 is taunting me!!!

The super detailed GUNGRAVE figure at my bud's anime place is still there.. URGH! I am hoping he will eventually want a knife from me to trade ; ) for it. but no.. NO GG DVD 3 out at his place yet :
I bought two DVDS Initial D Stage 4 DVD 2 and Luc besson's TAXI.. I hitnk I will like them both.. and ofcourse it's also a pleasure to chat and fuck around with Joe, the local Filipino Anime junkie at the store cause he is my age group and grew up with the same giant robot (etc) anime and live action Sentai (power rangers) shit as me.. it must be geeky to do RANGER poses at the bowling alley parking lot.

Tho not as bad as me seeing a bunch of fine young teenagers do their impression of SHOPPING CART JACKASS. Now that I have seen that in real life I can say my day was rounded up.

But I need to watch all of my SLAM DUNK DVDs (nostalgia) before I dive into this much talked about NARUTO.

MORE LATER hopefully : ) I still need to finish up that pic for my knife buddy's T-shirt.
That and I need to watch more ASHITA NO JOE!!! makenaizo YABUKIII JOOOOOEEEE! There were Pshonen even in the 70s and they touched all. Boxing wa suki desu ka?
(cause Joe at the anime place wants to borrow it.. ah... twisted mind lost in a Pokemon world.)

WHEN YOU DIE

what song will be playing, on the radio?


-FYI, DM (desperation move), SDM (super death move). It might not be common knowledge but the younger Johnny Holiday requires REDLINE + 3 DM spheres to accomplish F.O.G. Older Johnny needs only 3 DMS's (and 20 Marlboros).

-So get this I am itching to wear a white tie but life continues and I am out of GUINNESS.. BUUUU... I have an infatuous supporting character, a very charming title, and a sleek hatable yet likable villain (to my narcissistic mind anyways), hell even a cute ultra cute F.O.G. mascot, yet Tensai, the main chara has not made himself known to me.. MUKATSUKUUUU!!! >: [

-Trying my best NOT to make this a Silent Darkness prequel, but once again reading page 107 of SD, I can't help but feel nostalgic : 1

- I think its time to sleep.. but for the death of me I thought of our friendly neighbourhood SKITZO, VENOM (they need to feature him in Spider Man 3) from Marvel superheroes.. "WE ARE BETTER!"
That and remembering my trip to vegas this year and spending a lot of time arcade driving in LUXOR (egyptian motiv), that, wow.. Inubis does have a nice badass look to him : D

VOILA!!! THE [TERRIBLE MASTER] INUBIS, and Z.
Let's not forget Johnny's SUPER DEATH move - the ever so cute, FETUS OF [G_O_D].

TO CREATE A HERO...

WE HAD TO BEGIN WITH WHAT EVERY HERO REQUIRES - [A VILLAIN]!
-John Woo.

here's something I sketched at the tables cause I made the 'mistake' of NOT being fashionably late (and no PDA with a chapter of purple to edit.) for a lady's birthday party
: p : D oh da sideburns!!!! BURN THAT GAS! BURN THAT GAS, BOY. GET SOOOOME - PUT THE POWER DOWN - LEG DROP!! POWER SLAM!!!


Nuthin beats a southern gentleman and sideburns!!

JUST GOT BACK FROM THE PARTY I found this neat yellow paper bag with a little baby duck and eggs (from barnes & noble) on it VERY CUTE *___* ...it helps balance my violent tendancies. Bad news = I didn't get to wear all black and a white tie :( on account that I remembered it was a half Chinese birthday. Translation: Red. No black. Since I am a team player I opted to my trusty blood red chinese silk shirt : D HUUUUGH! Dressing up like garbage (army cargo pants and black shirt) on a daily basis it's a welcome opportunity to look civilized and waltz sometimes.

it was pretty cool tho.. very convincing cross dressers, polyester, an endless waltz, LOTS of MEAN sideburns, and ofcourse the STAR OF THE SHOW.. a HALF CHINESE ELVIS singing Jailhouse Rock! p^o^q rock on half Chinese daddy-oh! UHUHUH!

No booze tho so i had to get some GUINNESS on the way home.

ZEALOUSY

slowly a purpose is revealed.. to me.



"DISILLUSIONED BY A GREAT curse, THE HATRED TURNED Z's HAIR [BLACK]. IS THERE ANY 'PURPOSE' TO THIS LIFE, WHEN YOU ARE INDIFFERENT AND LIVE AIMLESSLY - WHEN YOU BECOME 'ULTIMATE'?"

-->Today was a surprisingly productive day at work... Well sketchwise anyways : D have a nice weekend guys! (I monochomatically coloured the pic, I hated it at first but grew to like it.)

--> GYADDAM TIES!! I just spent the last TWO FRIGGIN HOURS trying to tie a tie.
I suck >__<. I swear to GOD if I have a STAND, my STAND ABILITY will be to trap a person in a box of mirrors where the only way he can get out is by tieing a perfect tie. I feel like I was about to PUKE my fucking GUTS OUT by the end.

"he butchers children"

his wife cheated on him...


Long day at work again. Hopefully I can update something later : D

Decided to update PURPLE 11 - Originally in 96 I thought Kim's two kids was a boy and a girl, but SNK decided it was 2 sons.. so I changed the names. From Don + Boo to KIM DONG HWAN + KIM JAE HOON.
heck.. Don = Dong Hwan.. I was close in my mindreading ^__^.

FORTRESS

built on dreams...

When I move I have to set up my computer and drawing/drafting table area to be like a command fortress liek I did in college.. Mental note. must have a bowie knife on the side of my chair (has to be comfortable unlike the P.O.S. I have now, and the secret holsters nearby). Tripwires a must... My new place has an alarm too.. good good good.

COOL TRIBAL PENDANTS
-I am not one for neck jewelry but I rememebr these cool TRIBAL pendants I saw in LAS VEGAS. VERY COOL indeed : D. I like the assymetrical ones like PEGASUS, OHM, STAG & TRITON (looks like something ASH would wear). It must be cool to draw this stuff.

MRB FANART!
-Yuu rocks! : D

A NEW SHIRT
-I just got my last BOUNTY HUNTER T-SHIRT yesterday and forgot to post it. ^__^ happy happy since I got it on sale and it was out of stock (ugh) worth the wait, eventho the webpage seems like its run by a bunch of freaks, the customrsuport guy was actually quite nice and polite.
it had my fave quote from my main man, NEIT!

-WARNING: the other shirts in this page are VERY VERY offensive, I think the more sexually explicit ones are really unwarranted, but I can't resist the gun ones (sigh, I guess how I feel about sexuality is how liberals feel about my gun shirts... too bad; so sad.).

Happy Sad Happy Sad

are you wonderful today?


Today was a really weird day.. woke up groggy, got to work perky. Nothing much happened today except I got my new Leatherman Wave tool.. Now I can be like MacGuyver and be all superhero!!! (however Leatherman tools are superior to Swiss Army Knives - just look at its sentry removal applications in PROOF OF LIFE). What I really think is cool is the TITANIUM LEATHERMAN Charge Ti.

MORE!! B&S ROADSHOW!
BS-1-3
BS-1-4